looking good

yes me, i know. =//

what's not looking good tho is the sight of a certain pale-skinned dude at the ri pool. -shudders..

so anw sch's been great. been probability-ing and it's so damn fun, im turning into a nerd ohnoes! crashed h2 physics tut and sat at the back with the other 2 trios and fungs made me some MensHealth rubbish (i really think it made him horny leyhh) and then the girls were making me moan. eh no i clarify, they were getting me to do some moaning, on my own, i mean not like they were making making me moan. O.o meh yeah.. but fungs got goosebumps and taufiq blasted music so that he wouldnt hear me moaning. poots. anw im compiling wise words from xinge, so today's is: "moaning and groaning are all the same. they're just noise" and "you can all get A for maths too. just dont listen to limbay and mug hard" alrights A ftw~!

oh and i confirmed yst that im a woman. we're doing soccer for our pe module now and i was goal-keeping and melho(who secretly hates me, i knew it!) aimed straight for me and i instinctively stuck one hand out to block the ball and the other arm went across my chest to protect my most vital organs. YES IM A WOMAN! btw i think i love soccer. whee!

i succumbed to the swensens student meal after sch today and got myself a mega burger for $9.80 excl gst and service charge.. but it was good.. =D

met nw for my weekly 1.5hr dosage of lovin'.. O.o ohwells yar didnt get takoyaki, now im regretting it boos..

NEED TO MUG NAO. probability heh heh

(Chorus)
Well you turn when I talk
Run when I walk
Rise when I fall
Burn when I shiver
Smile when I frown
Go when I come around
You twist when I shout
In when i'm out
There when I'm here
Why do I bother?
Laugh when i'm down
Whine when I make a sound

It's Sunday, it’s Monday
It’s bloody everyday
You got me wanting out the door
It’s something, no it’s nothing
Yeah it’s everything you believe
You know I've heard it all before

(chorus)
When I'm near you
When I need you
Yeah that’s when you’re furthest away
What would it take to make you stay?
There’s someone, there’s no one
Well it seems like everyone
Got to see you yesterday

(chorus)
Yeah it’s Sunday
No it’s Monday
Oh it’s everyday
You got me wanting out the door
Yeah it’s something
No it’s nothing
Well it’s everything
You know I’ve heard it all before
Oh yeah I’ve heard it all before

wise words, yo. the great decay indeed..

olivejuice//

induced

so j1 induction camp went by smoothly enough.. minor hiccups here and there and i spose the initial plan was flexible enough to accomodate changes which made the camp all the more, exciting.. like team talk evolving into truth & dare/scandal-sharing/sleeping etc.. and initiation haha! that was rather successful i thought, if we ignore the bit where the trackers desperately asked us to leave cos they needed the track and their coach looked damn pissed it was freaky.. and the Run of Hopes and Dreams was really fun.. the team is just damn awesome, i am blessed. =)

oh i missed a step in the lt when we were gonna have team contract thing and i fell like a huge lump. how embarrassing lol.. ooh and i managed to get last min reservations to swensens at united square for 45 ppl wooh! apparently some restaurants do take reservations on weekends, just that the ones i contacted earlier didnt.. -.- anw cafe cartel and fish & co.'s favoured over swensens, but given the choice between that and ordering-in pizza, they'd choose the former.. =/ ohwells..

Ravenclaw had nice ppl yay! i think marc see makes a great group leader! capt ball was fun and exciting, tho the boys did the usual habit of playing among themselves most of the time.. the short ravenclaw girls' girly bonding thing right when camp ended was i spose, pretttyy weird.. haha! but love you all anw muacks! O.o

(andrea's so pretty yayy)


cheerleaders HAHAHA!


team loveee..


t1 bitches/sluts ftw!


and finally, it's been a pleasure working with you co-ic dearest! =)

and as taufiq would say, im going to hell for that..

oh ptm was alright i spose.. dad can be abit cringe-worthy but im really very lucky that he was understanding and didnt like get damn pissed bout my awful awful grades.. oh haha i was getting lunch at adam road with prav and kenneth when dad drove past cos he was having lunch there as well. then when i called him while he was parking, he asked whether i changed out yet cos i was in shorts. then we decided that it was okay since my shorts are about as long as a skirt anw hoho.. he gave us a lift to sch since he was going there anws.. oh pretty much all of the teachers said that im a good girl and have the right attitude woo! should suck up more yayy! =//

oh collected new car today.. it's alot smaller but pretty comfy inside.. had pretty much the same features, minus indiv aircon and lights and mini tables, but the gps system is kickass cool wooh! gonna miss the old car tho and the car plate no..

27/03/05 was when nw made his move and we got the car in 2004, which made the car plate no. very significant. now it's gone. hmm..


ohwells we didnt take pictures with the new car.. RIP old car, we'll miss you!

just read na's lj, and i spose i might as well comment. "i had a conversation with syimah that really pissed me off the other day- not with her, but myself. she said the ultimate aim in one's life was to create babies." well i do spose i meant it in a biological, religious purpose in life thing.. but yeah i want kids cos i think it's pretty wonderful to create some thing (not just in a sexual/biological sense) but it's like creating the greatest work of art.

okay i gave up trying to explain cos i just cant find the right words. -defeated. owells i spose all i really want is to challenge myself in molding my kids to be great people.. and my dream of opening that activity centre for underpriviledged kids is kinda like expanding my work.. i guess how we find what we leave behind to be worthy or not is subjective, the way na doesnt find reproduction to be that great.. but i'd be content with having raised great kids and if i were given the opportunity to help other children to grow up to be great ppl, i'd die very very happy indeed..

hmm happy 37th, love.. spending only 4hrs together in one month is sad, but i spose things can only get better, yes? hoho owells.. i love you.
olivejuice//

hello!

okay should stop being emo.
hmm so basically,
sch today started off like this: -.- then =(

then civics was like this: D=

then break was like this: O.o
oh btw who knows what nagasari looks like?? cos i asked 4 j1 melayoos, one of which i have never talked to before, and most of them asked "is that a person?" lol! (and poots i just googled it and taufiq's right. the one that i had in mind's tepung pelita gar..)

then maths lecture was: =/

then seahist was: X_X

then break was: zzz

then econs test was: =(( then =))

then slacking with laksh and na was: =D
we're worried that we're not girly girls ohnoes!

followed na and melz to pizza hut awhile. then met nw, who was late as usual, and had pizza hut. they gave us the pretty booth table haha! food was good..

then sent nw off at busstop. (funny aint it?)
then walked home in the drizzle. woohoo

i suppose i feel so much better when i dont think..

olivejuice//

watch me fall

god everyone's just going mad, and im not acting myself, or the self i used to be. i need to have more restraint, im turning into some undiplomatic hysterical melodramatic bitch, it is unsafe, i need to hide in my little fake coccoon. -sad.

i am becoming teh emo.

gym today felt good.

some ppl are so -.-

im sorry i cant talk it out. i just miss us. yeah

-shrugs..

olivejuice// be there

barenaked, again

life is difficult. and being too self-aware just sucks.

like you know how crying can be relieving? well i cant even cry without suddenly having another me staring out through my eyes and at my hands over my eyes and thinking how just bloody stupid and drama it is. so then i stop, numbed and wonder, what now?

or how i cant even feel sorry for myself proper without thinking that im selfish and that there are other ppl have it much worse than me. well i cant help them anw and then i dont even help myself.

or like how i care so much for other ppl, tt i disregard my studies, my future and what's best for me simply because i believe too much in others or that others will change. but they wont, and i just dont have the guts to do what i ought to.

i hate i hate i hate pretending. i am fucking drama but god i just wish i could just be real, but noone wants to be there for a sad lump. i am broken and scared and hurt but i cant show it. nope not at all.. =)

i love you so much// love isnt like this.

long day

and thus i shall split yst into 3 parts!

trg + friendlies
trg was okay la, not so bad. the k2s and esp k1s doing resistance with lifejacks looked so Ouch. but i guess i wasnt all pity cos im in a big fat t1 so.. =/ improved 2k timing, tho not pb but still since i always tell others, 'every improvement counts' so yeah woohoo.. then 20 x 40 bursts was.. relatively gg but the company of the single boaters was fun. =)

and haha i love the t1 bitches.. py and i were embarassingly high so i apologize. i'll control my high next time..? anw, the races were understated i spose.. and kinda unprofessional, on a certain person's side but it was all fun so yay! my wave was sposed to have 4 boats but a cj boat decided to join in when we were aligning and i was like O.o hey wtf! but okay la it was all good in the end. 2 cj, 2 mj and i got first woo.. not a huge achievement, but it's a start..

interim
during the madness while keeping boats, i got a phonecall. a few phonecalls, or more like The Phonecall as py put it. it was embarrassing and i was hyperventilating and i guess you can say that i was quite a mess. thanks teammates for being all nice and everything and im sorry i left before team cheer or missed whatever else.. love all of yoos.

went to sch to shower, pray, eat my adam rd nasi lemak packed lunch, pray then headed to pris' place @ the Rafflesia opp sch lol! i like quiet time..

class bbq/parteh
started off pretty low-key cos there were only what, 6-7 of us when the men, ie nigel and me and maybe woonie, attempted to start the fire. then nigel and i gave up and he blasted music and i plopped in a chair. and poured my heart out. im sorry for being a party pooper at tt point and thankyou for the concern ppl..

so anw i tried to make up for it by uh attempting to liven up the party.. nigel and i went to uh change.. (haha nigel haha!) oh and fungs and yq came so it was like scouts at one pit and bb at the other attempting to start the fire. but the winner was pris' dad who saved the day lol..

many ppl declined getting dumped into the pool but the few who agreed were a great sport about it ah.. fungs was the best of course haha! i think being in canoeing made me enjoy being in water eventho i cant swim, but being able to stand in the water helped too haha. and getting suddenly carried and thrown like a sack into the water by nigel and wenchun was scary but really really fun. na said i screamed like a banshee..

i still think fiona linda and xinge are awesome bbq-ers, they're so cute and i enjoy being their guinea pig.. raw chicken ftw~!

na and i cabbed home at 8.45 woo.. trying to get the cabs was funny, silly and fun. love you na!

so yup thanks pris for making my day by hosting the most awesome bbq. btw im sorry for being all annoying ard you and eherm but lol i think it's sweet that your parents are all cool about it and may the two of you last for a long long long long timee..

the class was just pure joy. love you all! gonna party like that for post-As aight!

i almost didnt wanna go for class bbq cos i was very much not in the mood but im glad i did. getting high was nice..

olivejuice// i guess i always knew it'd be okay. i suppose..

we live on fascination

pretty song. =)

currently at comlab 2 and i just booked parent-teacher meeting slots for my dad ugh. D=

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PRAV! sorry i missed the parteh this morning..

in any case, nw darling made me breakfast again. haha! i cant upload the picture here, which is not much of a loss i guess cos it doesnt look too pretty.. >< but very VERY yummy and just like the previous time, very filling.. which is quite rare for me to say, as na would gladly point out. hoho good stuff.. =)

oh i had the horriblest dreams last night. so sad so sad.. dont die anytime soon ohkays! =/

anw, in reply to bim's tag-->, i was sick yst. i had flu and fever boos! i already had a dry cough on monday annen taufiq was being all sick and flu-ey so he passed the flu bug to me(during maths i think cos there were a few of us in an air-conned classroom and only then did i start sneezing alot) being sick is awful bahs.

oh but na's more sick but she hasnt take a day off sch at all which makes her very hardcore. which reminds me, na sort of gave me a challenge today. i need to mug more than her. yeah. so i will. -nods fervently..

riiight. and two j4 guys gave us a talk bout ns during civics today. couples tend to break up during bmt ohnoes.. =/ i think if i ever went for ns, i'd definitely aim for OCS, cept that mom made it quite clear that i was never to go for ns so ohwells..

trg yst was relatively hardcore. first 2k timing was O.o and the other 2 was humiliating. back hurts like nobody's business and eventho i know i might as well just live with the pain like i always have but then parents will be damn pissed cos they paid for my physio and all that. ugh and friendlies this sat, im gonna get pwned like mad i dont wanna go.. D=

aight gtg econs starting soon.

olivejuice// more than anything in the world! =)

introspect

am home now. nope i didnt go for trg. why? cos i did some simple back-strengthening exercises yst that physiotherapist told me to do and ended up with a cramped back all night. and dad reminded me that doc told me to make sure i have "pain-free" trgs. so i decided to go to the park with dad and sisters this morning to run. i ended up running only one round cos my back was hurting. wth. i guess im taking up doc's offer for excuse from napfa. which is this monday. ugh i hate giving up.. and to think i was aiming for top 10 for napfa again.. =(
sigh.

right so yst was a nice enough day..
cos it started off with this.

my sayang made me breakfast haha! okay it may not look very appetizing, as teammates insisted, but it really tastes heavenly.. double layered ramly with cheese and pepperoni ftw! =)) the way to my heart is through my stomach boos.. and for the burger, i think i can last another week of not seeing you.. =/ owells. thanks, love..

so then later at 10.40 laksh and i followed na to collect our pw results..

pw rep holding our pw grades. aww sho cute. haha well done 5A, we're one step closer to living up to our name.. =D

ohyeah and for civics on thurs, we did some career test thing.
here are my potential careers that suit my personality:
SAE
Counselor/Therapist
Home economics teacher
School counselor
School teacher
and the categories are ranked as such:
1. Social (helpers)
2. Artistic (creators)
3. Enterprising (persuaders)
4. Realistic (do-ers)
5. Conventional (organisers)
6. Investigative (thinkers)

lol im very much not a thinker.. oh pris thinks im introspective! haha yay! =//

okay gtg to sch awhile now.

olivejuice//

bimqi's first scarring

lol just rmbed an idiom that sums up Untraceable..

Curiosity kills the cat.

hoho!

bimqi's first scarring

haha yes the two of us who were "unable to attend training due to unforseen circumstances" (no, not pon), decided that urgent destressing was in order, so we caught a 2.35pm slot of Untraceable, which was a very very good show.. the storyline was interesting and the effects were awfully well done and terribly vivid ugh.. bim refused to look at any of the close-ups of the 'ugly' scenes tsk.. ><

lol on the other hand, the show was also good gp material, what with issues such as the boons and banes of technology, the extensive reach and influence of mass media, the degeneration of society's morals, herd mentality and the power of the individual in instigating certain values in a society..

hahaha right.. anws, after the show, we spent ard an hour walking around j8 to finish our drinks and also to allow bim to regain her composure.. =D

however, i somewhat thought the show was lacking in, something. i felt the neccesary emotions during the show, but was quite numbed afterwards.. pillowman has mucked up my system boos..

oh yeah i finally got a C for gp. though some ppl finally got their As, i must say that i dont mind having low standards.. we gotta start from somewhere, no? =)

olivejuice// i really miss you so

pillowman

i've just whizzed through the assembly crowd, and thank goodness for the week-long cancellation of pe for j2s, i can finally satisfy my dire need to blog.

firstly, Pillowman yst was so amazingly brilliant! it was so disturbing and creepy and it made me feel sick throughout the play and for very long after but despite all the madness, the familial aspect of the play was still so beautiful(thanks to the fantastic Fantastic acting of course). and the much-needed bouts of humour livened the play muchly and constantly provided the gulp of fresh air after being sucked into the deranged world of the sick and twisted.. and i will repeat what i said to both nw and na, no amount of palahniuk can prepare anyone for pillowman. okay i haven't read enough palahniuk to accurately judge but really! i can totally understand how people can pass out listening to Guts being read aloud cos yst was really goddamn awful, though the theatrics definitely added a punch, and i was so thankful for the brief intermission cos i could finally take a breather from the nausea..

damn play's set up camp in my head and i had some awful dreams about it last night that made me shiver when i woke up this morning, though i cant rmb it at all now.. the actors were just incredible.. it's in times like this that i kick myself for my utter incompetence in writing and much-limited vocab cos im unable to fully and succinctly encompass the superbness of pillowman. but i guess basically, you should've been there.

we missed the last bus and decided to take NR3 instead and meanwhile trooped to starbucks for awhile.. but apparently nr3 doesnt operate on sundays, which we only figured out afterwards cos we are Very experienced creatures of the night, so we cabbed home. cruising down the highway at 120km/h and nursing my poor disturbed mind with a java chip venti was definitely the icing on the cake. thankyou mom for sponsoring the tickets (though i think it's best that she never found out the amount of course language and sick themes that permeated the play)

moving on, Girl interrupted is an amazing book! ugh i just used amazing to describe both pillowman and GI. anww, i find it so thought-provoking without being annoyingly pretentious, though perhaps my inane thoughts are just easily provoked.. =/ in any case, the mention of plato's allegory of the cave in the book made me lol..

which reminds me, today while waiting for ssp to start, i was reading at the table outside the com labs when this uberly geeky boy just plopped opposite me and though he quietly and innocently mugged opposite me, his presence was bloody stifling and i felt a strong urge to bare my teeth and snarl the GI way.. meh..

in any case, the book made me consider the advantages of being mad.. i've been in a rather depressive state lately, and what with cousin's account of her brief encounter being in the mad ward of NUH, i realize that i fit the bill quite perfectly. normal by day and depressive by night! wow! but then i realized that i might as well gather my wits soon cos i'd have to sit the bloody As anw, either now or later when i get out of the madhouse since you cant really survive in singapore without having some form of qualification.. however, such a retreat really does have its appeal..

talking to dad today made me realize how i actually enjoy being relatively stupid or displaying a "lesser than thou" front, however perverse it may be, cos it makes the other person quite pleased with himself and i have no need to actually try to make myself look smart or anything cos it's just taken for granted that im not. hmm, okay maybe i dont feel that way all the time. cos now it seems a tad bit depressing.. =/

btw bern says that for my kind of grades, i might get suspended from trainings till ct2, which leaves only a week before nats and which by the looks of such a situation, i am quite unlikely to compete in..

school seems quite meaningless of late..

olivejuice//

push

so finally got back results for the last of our core subjects today.. SUSU. definitely the worst exam i've sat for bother.. ggm's prolly gonna have a nice friendly chat with me when he finds out bout my grades and i just cannot imagine what he'd say/do. screwed up la, i put in more effort this time and see where it got me. pfft.

a little something from zr,
when things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
when the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
when the funds are low and the debts are high
and you want to smile, but you have to sigh.
when care is pressing you down a bit
rest if you must, but dont you quit.

life is queer with its twists and turns
as every one of us sometimes learns
and many a fellow turns about
when he might have won had he stuck it out
don't give up though the pace seems slow
you may succeed with another blow

often the goal is nearer than
it seems to a faint and faltering man
often the struggler has given up
when he might have captured the victor's cup
and he learnt too late when the night came down
how close he was to the golden crown

success is failure turned inside out
the silver tint in the clouds of doubt
and you never can tell how close you are
it might be near when it seems afar
so stick to the fight when you are hardest hit
it's when things seem worst that you must not quit.

nice stuff yup.. on a lighter note, i watched enchanted yst, and it truly was one of the prettiest shows i've watched in a long while.. i wanna be a princess whee! O.o the songs were really really nice too.. =))

and finally a little something from njcc,


first for heats yay!


beloved k4! =D


us being a good sport and smiling with our imaginary plaques.. =)

girls!


guys + girls!

what a bunch of camwhores.. haha rafflesrow <3!

olivejuice//

pictures from woonie

much belated but very lol still =D

1. i was bored in class


2.tried to do some poses in the box-like thingeys



3. and learnt to fly



4.before settling down to mug.

whee i look so mugger! =D

so fine the pictures weren't exactly taken in that order but yeah.. haha fun stuffs to do in class.. =)

olivejuice//