pms

a few things i learnt about myself this week:
1. i really cant stand ppl with no tact, or see no need in being tactful. and hurts others in the process, even if it's not intended to. i dont mean that people should avoid saying some things just so that they would not hurt the person. im all for honesty, but yeah just know how to say things right la. idiots. (this is a general observation)

2. i simply cannot have proper conversations. partly cos of my bad grasp of well, words, and my lack of having anything interesting, entertaining or in any way important to talk about. i get the feel that people around me, would rather move on to the next person. maybe next time my conversations should go like this, "oh Hi. it's okay, you can go talk to him/her now"

3. i realize that i really hate ppl thinking that im stupid. i really really do. and i can fucking tell if you think im dense la, gar. what i lack in iq is prolly made up for in eq. okay that was a rather pompous comment hoho.

4. i am too bloody sensitive. i read too much into actions, words, expressions and get all worked up and this affects my productivity alott. i feel too much in general, i think. seriously, i should've been a boy. boys feels alot less, dont they? =/

5. i wish i was a boy.

6. if you asked me which year in my 18yrs of living, i'd be happy to be stuck in, i'd say 2005, when i was in sec3 and 15. that year was awesome cos of:
a. ob spore
b. perbayu drama
c. nazri and the whole falling in love thing
d. ob sabah
e. om
f. sis said my figure was nicest that year
though there are of course a few things i could do without, like:
i. specs course and embarrassing myself so bad
ii. feeling like a total failure when i found out i wasnt selected for snr specs
iii. the trials and tribulations of an unapproved relationship

7. im looking at people differently nowadays and becoming less accepting of their flaws.

plus i cant wait to get out of stifling relationships and get to know new people. i wanna reach out and connect, but i want to do so on a brand new slate. it sucks when you start to have to think around people you'd usually be fine around. or when you cant shake the feeling that they'd rather not be around you and that you're just a stopgap before someone more entertaining comes along

life sucks.
on a brighter note,
i've managed to satisfy most of my cravings/food loves just before the fasting month starts on monday. so far i've had: swensens' mega burger, bubble tea, fries & apple pie from macs, kfc chicken meal, lambchop, anatolia beef doner, yami yogurt tropicana peach, Royals' oreo cheesecake, rambutan, stall 11 food haha and hopefully tmr i can get my takoyaki from jp banquet and Javachip venti from starbucks. (:

i think the reason why i love food so much is because it's always there for me.. hmm.

went out for na's birthday outing today with the usual dudes. anatolia and just talking was fun.. then pretending to be taufiq on the phone was entertaining too. then we went to lan for an hour and played counterstrike, which i maintain is still a horriblehorrible game. no wonder kids nowadays are becoming more violent. but still, the short bouts of cheap thrill was, well, thrilling. oh and wtf ew taufiq wore my pants. D:

gp prelims was okay. essay was pretty good i thought. but i think i screwed compre. sigh

we made shirts for the teachers for teachers' day. a bunch of us designed it and linda printed it and passed it to me yst morning to iron on. they look pretty darn good, im proud of us. (:

27/08/08- Happy 41st, love. here's to more months/years together ahead.. =)

i need to finish maths by tonight kbye

olivejuice// i love you more than anything

break the ice

haha went ice skating with nazzer and his little sister on sat cos he hadta babysit her lol.. it was really fun and i took alot of videos yay!
i liked this one best haha:

haha the end bit is Lol and oh-so-adorable.. (:

anw i received this, 'speech to the graduating class of 2008 at NTU convocation ceremony last week by Adrian Tan, a litigation lawyer and the author of The Teenage Textbook' in my email and i quite liked this bit

Rather, I exhort you to love another human being. It
may seem odd for me to tell you this. You may expect it to happen
naturally, without deliberation. That is false. Modern society is
anti-love. We've taken a microscope to everyone to bring out their
flaws and shortcomings. It far easier to find a reason not to love someone,
than otherwise. Rejection requires only one reason.
Love requires complete acceptance. It is hard work– the only kind of work
that I find palatable.

Loving someone has great benefits. There is admiration,
learning, attraction and something which, for the want of a better word,
we call happiness. In loving
someone, we become inspired to better
ourselves in every way. We learn the truth
worthlessness of material things. We celebrate
being human. Loving is good for the soul

Loving someone is therefore very important, and it is also
important to choose the right person. Despite popular culture, love
doesn't happen by chance,
at first sight, across a crowded dance floor. It grows
slowly, sinking roots first before branching and
blossoming. It is not a silly weed, but a mighty tree that weathers every storm.

You will find, that when you have someone to love, that the
face is less important than the brain, and the body is less important
than the heart.

You will also find that it is no great tragedy if your love
is not reciprocated. You are not doing it to be loved back. Its value is
to inspire you.

Finally, you will find that there is no half-measure when it
comes to loving someone. You either don't, or you do with every cell in
your body, completely and utterly, without reservation or apology.
It consumes you, and you are reborn, all the better for it.

eh so long. =//

went to gym with priya just now and omg im so degenned, we only did light-weights and i wanted to cry cos i was so tired meh! and stupid threadmill, i hate running. D:

achingg like mad.

kay mug time nao..

LIYANA IS A PONNER! (pfffft)

olivejuice// get well soon kay? ):

fangirl

was watching the women's gymnastics olympics events and they're really super awesome..

i always wanted to be a gymnast boos! doubt parents would've let me join anw cos of the attire.. ): i rmb in sec1 when my french classes were in the second aftn slot and all the rg girls had the first slot, and there was a period of time when i went to watch alot of gym competitions(cant be nats ryt? cos it was pretty early on in the year.. =/), which were held at bishan stadium.. so yup then i'd run off for french and manage to fill up my match support card too yay!

i really really really really really wanna try the uneven bars.. ):

so anw, Nadia Comaneci is damn awesome! and how she got together with her husband is sho cute. haha! plus- "Because Romania's government regarded her as a valuable Communist model of domination in sports and because it feared that she might defect to the United States, they no longer allowed her to travel to Western countries." she reigned during the time of the cold war, fancy that! she ran away to america in late 1989 lol.. anw, must watch This:


ohwait this girl's bloody awesome too haha!


owells sch was kinda bleah. some things were bothering me so yup left sch asap after seahist lecture and tried not to think too much.. (:

oh but since i rushed home, i didnt get to vote for the prom nominees myself and got nigel to do it for me.. michelle chia for prom queen! haha! =D

seeing nazzer tmr yay.. =)

olivejuice//

bring it on

na's made me realize that there's no point agonizing about this odd oddd situation, so yes i've decided to embrace my super duper hot body yes! O.o random acquaintances have come up to me and LOL-ed but it's okay.. in fact i've secured quite some votes from old friends.. and of course from the dudes i've threatened as well.. connecting with my fans indeed lol. haha!

alright so for those who have not noticed the television sets around sch, this is the picture i sent in:

though i thought this picture fit ms/mr 'hot bod' best,
(i look damn fierce lol lol!!)

and this one was

lol.

HUMBLE BEGINNINGS:

farin's favourite (confused) water buffalo, yo.

Random picture of the day:

baby's so super cute! and i look almost motherly hahhh!

right hoho. new phone! w760i. (:

olivejuice// catch me if you can.

fat

need to go on a diet. eating less would definitely be very difficult for me but owells shall try eating healthier stuff. and it's about time i hit the gym, flabs everywhere's starting to gross me out ack.

kitchen and toilet at home have been bombed. went to check out the damage last night and got damn shocked. looked like a scene from a horror show. raw untiled walls and floor and mounds of sand. teh freaky!!

right okay Sat, dad had work so sisters and i went to watch the ndp fireworks ourselves cos littlest sister looked so disappointed, poor thing. anw yeah damn good view of the water shows and fireworks right in front, plus starbucks right behind yay good life..

Sunday- mugged at home but very sloww. Summation took up a hell lot of time gar..

Monday. went out with nazzer in the morning, where he took very long and alott of persuading to finally agree to fetch me home after his jamming session. but then me being the totally understanding girlfriend (hahaha) decided to mug at natl library instead, where i'll be nearer to his jamming studio. walked the long botanic gardens route, which isnt all that fun anymore somehow. =/ nazzer fed me spaghetti that he half cooked. =//

finally finally made it to natl lib but i knocked out for 30mins before i got down to productive UN mugging. (:

then nazzer fetched me home.
im damn emo and i think too much bout the silliest things how? D:

oh 8/14 of the 5a girls were having relationship discussion/consultation during break just now.. one word: LOL.

ah right another LOL-ing thing. I is Ms Hot Bod nominee. D: argh what a joke, i hope teammates will at least vote for me since they're putting me through this in the first place.. Deborahtan is Hotbod nominee too, but she's pretty at least so she'll get quite some votes. know what, it's sad and kind-of embarrassing to be considered "hot" because of our manly attributes. ah wth..

ahwell whoever's reading this entry better vote too. -glares and cracks knuckles. sigh..

olivejuice// cheers to a very special relationship..

look where we are

we've come so far,
and there's still a longggggg long way to go~!

i think i still like that natl day song best lol..

yst was a super long, draining and maddd day.. started with gp in the morning, where ms soh decided that i was incapable of successfully attempting a certain essay qn. was rather insulted owells.. then lessons continued, break-less till 3pm including gp and ihist rem. then right after tt i hadta send class pictures to whoever for the farewell video montage thing. then chiong gp essay..

finally finally had free buffet dinner at 4.30! took two plates of noodles, 5chicken drumlets and lots of fishball! :D and na helped me buy starbucks whee! then jean and i rushed our essays till 6 plus hoho..

only approx half the class sat together for the natl day concert boos! ohh and it rained so they hadta use the hall instead of the $10,000 stage at the stadium.. O.o ahwell.. concert wasnt too bad.. promethean ceremony was ohkay cept that i screamed for canoeing when the ppl ard a relatively quiet area, which was pretty embarrassing.. emcees were rather -.- but vadi was lovee "i need to take care of my goat. bekk", performances were not bad i guess, but the gym collaboration thing was awesomeeee! but of course, highlight of the day was community singing, as usual.. funny how there wasnt really a need for the lyrics on the screen when practically everyone remembers the words to pretty much all the natl day songs.. effective nationalistic propaganda, yo. the dudes were fun to sing with haha! and yes, am gonna go clubbing with zijian, the closet patriot, and request for natl day songs only cos we know which parts of the song to jump to lol! i wasnt drunk, really.

bummed awhile in the canteen with FariNa and melz.. dad fetched farin and i afterwards yupp..
and heh using the many lightsticks that somehow ended up going home with me, i made this:

lol.

we had thursday timetable on wed so sch was pretty slack.. wanted to donate blood with sharyn after sch and even tried to get the rest of the class to go as well.. so anw after waiting for approx 30mins, and only a the 2nd station ie medical checkup, i got bloody rejected zomg! cos i ticked yes for "have you had something something, chestpains etc before?" and the doctor insisted i go for a checkup before i can ever donate again. eventho i insisted it wasnt serious, and that i was a canoeist. ): sharyn got rejected too, at the final blood-sucking station cos they couldnt find her vein.. -.- ahwell we have a date next year to go donate blood, hopefully, lol! so yeah didnt get coolios bandage but somehow managed to get my oreos cos i told the organizers tt i needed comfort food to soothe my disappoinment. lol it worked at least.. then mugged at lib with FariNa till ninee..

only did maths today, so sloww..

haha i thought wenchun was kidding when he said he put the video up on youtube.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6lQLcmtZmqk
not embarrassing la, only na has the real weapons of mass destruction..
and having mentioned that, i am worried. =/

gonna see the fireworks with family tmr.. O.o

ah and renovations for the kitchen and toilet starts on sat. must stay away from home in the afternoons if i wish to mug in peace.. ):

kaymugnao
olivejuice//

T3W7

my my how fast time flies..

maths has been productive but hist has been slowww.. D:

diephysicsandecons. oh drfang didnt hide her shock when i answered her qn correctly in class today.. well laksh whispered the answer, but tt's not the point. im dumb and im sure everyone agrees too.. -depressed.

and horrible haircut, i look like a mushroom. -depressed summore.

on the upside, canoe dinner on friday was awesome. (: we had the whole upper floor of amirah's grill, where we made a hell lot of noise, it was crazy. food was GREAT! i was the first to get food heh. ohh but 17bucks buffet when they hardly refilled (approx 60 ppl leyh!) was kinda ripoff pfft.. oh but na was right, turkish food is very filling.. i only had one plate of ricebeeffishchicken, 2 bowls of mushroom soup, two plates of coleslaw, one small plate of hummus+bread building(haha i can be an architect!), fruits and alot of fruit punch. i usually eat alot more at buffets.. ):

so anw the girls sat at the coolios nefertitti and cleopatra areas where guys werent allowed to enter, so t we could sit cross-legged on the floor in our little dresses. omgz im such a skank, i wore a tiny dress, which somehow py convinced me to not wear with pants, and just so happens to be melho's top. im so short! D: oh and my name was sarah that night cos im a bad muslim in my shortshort dress. py says i need to pray 60times.. O.o haha!

lol but most of us were sleepy i think, but we did try to excite our lives by playing silly games.. shootshagmarry,where i decided to shag mary and marry nazri.. O.o and dare&dare where jiaqi got to choose to sit on either winnie or bryan (she chose winnie aww), prav got dared to sit next to aaron and ruffle his hair(major AWWW) and deb tapdanced in the middle of the room HAHAHA. alot of gossiping, as usual. small gift-exchange with the j1s and yupp that's pretty much it.. arab street's pretty freaky at night.. =/

pictures soon.

hmmm hasnt been a very eventful week..
oh mom had to babysit little niece last thurs so i ponned econs rem to go home and watch her.. (:

liyana and i ran into our h1 physics teacher on friday a few minutes before the class started and so we couldnt pon the lesson.. (na is jinxed boos)

having 3hr break now and na went home about an hour ago cos she had a crazy nose-bleed.. O.o scary..

okay nothing much else happened.

meeting nazri at 2. finally after so longg..
happyhappy. (:
sleepy need sleep nao..

olivejuice//